tarklovishki: (Default)
Over Facebook, my friend was telling everyone about this exchange thing she's doing by going over to Austria for a few months. She said you don't have to be a student to do it, and this got me thinking about doing it for about five or six months, just for a change of scenery to learn new things. Except the most logical one to take would mean I'm overseas for my eighteenth birthday.

This would also be a good excuse to get into some part-time jobs to save up for it, because fuck it's over a thousand dollars. I just really want to get outside Australia for a few months, except I don't know how to ask my Nan if I can go. It scares the crap out of me to leave because I do have a mild case of separation anxiety.

What do you think? Should I do it?
tarklovishki: (Default)

Oh, man. I remember a few months ago when the fandom was absolutely bursting with fics and art ... and now, it's like everyone's packing up shop and leaving. :( I was expecting something like this to happen, to be honest, but wow. I remember when it took ages for me to find something on my flist if I accidentally navigated away from it, but now two clicks and a couple of scrolls down, BAM, I've found it. I don't know, maybe I should join more communities and add more friends, but shit is going down.

... If only my Tumblr wasn't broken ...

Real life has been one major bitch to me, to be honest. I just found out last night that one of my best friends, who'd been coming onto me, calling me beautiful and wanting to kiss me, has been using me for eight freaking months. Eight! Son of a fucking bitch, I'm glad I only kissed him once. No, the bastard is going back to his ex - in the immortal words of my best friend, who the fuck goes back to their ex? Apparently it was a "mutual breakup" and on my friend's Tumblr, I found out that she'd been scowling at him and being a total ass.

If I squint, I can see the end of their relationship nearing.

Okay, so I don't think I quite handled the whole thing well; I blew up at him over the phone, my face full of tears, and then, in a fit of rage (you find that I have quite the nasty temper after a crying session) we both blew up at each other over the Internet. Yeah. Sometimes the Internet is just not a good place to land in times of teenage crisis.

I ended up, after getting angry at him over the phone, going to my friend's house. Keep in mind, it was ten o'clock at night. I'm really grateful that my friend and her mum allowed me to come over - they even paid for the taxi.

To add insult to injury, the taxi guy deliberately went the longest route to my friend's house. On a normal day, the cost of a taxi from my house to Waratah where she lives would be around ten to fifteen dollars. This complete douchebag ran the amount up to twenty-three dollars. Now, he could be a really sweet man, but seriously? Uh, I'm not appreciating the fact that he did that. I was polite to him and told him - through gritted teeth - where he was supposed to be going.

My friend, when I got there, allowed me to get behind her computer and get on the Internet, and this is where the argument took place. I'm notorious for being able to think up insults in half a second, tops. Less than that if I'm vengeful and in a completely bitchy mood. (But he did say that I could talk to him later and throw as many insults as I wanted, so naturally I took hold of this opportunity by the balls the first chance I had it.)

So basically I'm one friend down and ... strangely not upset about it. The bastard blamed me because he used me. I was willing to give him a chance, despite the fact that he told me how many of his friendships were ruined (by him? I do not know - probably heaps). But it's all my fault because I was being nice. See, this is part of the reason why so many people think I'm going to go from being bisexual to a complete lesbian. Don't ask me why, it's just what I've been told. My being nice means that I deserve to be hurt like that? Fuck him! I was nothing but a replacement for his ex-girlfriend, apparently. I'm not the kind of chick that forgives something like that. I was not put on this planet to be used by inconsiderate fucks who think they can get away with everything.

I've had a lot of time to cool off since last night, really. I'm back to being myself, with only one best friend left. It's sad because I remember being quite popular growing up, and then I started becoming an introverted, nerdy bookworm and suddenly I was left with nothing.

Anyway, I better wrap this up before I start ranting my ass off, which I'm close to doing.

Has anything like this ever happened to you?

L
o
v
e
Always,
Tarklovishki.

tarklovishki: (Default)

I feel really sad at the moment; I just heard that I'm invited to meet up with people I used to go to primary school with at Sandgate cemetery to visit a classmate's grave who unfortunately was killed in an accident two years ago. I never knew him well, but I'd known him since pre-school. He'd been a familiar face, and to learn that he was dead came as a real sucker punch to the gut.

I'm not sure how I'm going to get to Sandgate cemetery, but I really want to go and pay my respects to him, and yet at the same time I don't want to go because I'm afraid of seeing his grave and knowing that he's never going to come back. He used to do this trick with his eyelids where he would turn them inside out. He used to do it to freak us all out, and we'd all wonder how he could do that. He'd shrug and say "I don't know. I just can."

He is the first person I knew that has died, and for weeks after I learned what had happened to him, I was in shock. He'd been on life support, and I think it was his father who decided to turn it off, because there was nothing the doctors could do for him. Up until then, I childishly believed that everyone I knew at school was too young to die, and yet he is gone.

Even though I didn't know anything more than his full name, birthday and the eyelid trick, I miss him. My condolences go to his family and friends, who I know all still lament his death. I can't imagine the pain you guys feel.


I won!

Sep. 24th, 2011 06:16 pm
tarklovishki: (Default)
After coming home from inner-city Newcastle, I decided to check my email. Lo and behold, I'd gotten a message from Goodreads stating that I'd won the giveaway for "Prophets of the Ghost Ants"! It was the book that I'd wanted to win from the beginning! I won, I won, I won! *Dances* I have to wait 4-6 weeks for shipping, but I can't wait until I get a chance to read it; it sounds really interesting!
tarklovishki: (Default)
Next time I go out with my best friend, I'm going to make a note to be more careful when I get into play fights with him; he accidentally bashed his jaw into the bridge of my nose and knocked me out. Gave me a concussion in which it was difficult to stay awake. Had to go to the hospital and wear a neck brace for four, maybe five hours.

At least he took a first aid course last year and knew exactly what to do to keep me conscious and safe. <3

I learned my lesson; the nerve damage in my neck and minor concussion have taught me well.

Urgh...

Aug. 22nd, 2011 06:42 am
tarklovishki: (Default)
I have been feeling so under the weather lately that I'm surprised I haven't gone to the hospital yet. I think I'm getting insomnia because I'm always asleep during the day and I haven't been outside the house in over a week. Constant headaches and whatnot are plaguing me! My nan thinks my near-vegetarian diet (I only eat select meat like chicken and lamb) has pushed me off my cycle because I'm not getting enough iron to sustain me.


Funnily enough, it doesn't plague me when I'm writing; it gets me when I'm watching television or an hour out from falling asleep. I have glasses that I'm supposed to wear -- otherwise I'll be going blind later on in life -- but I just can't seem to remember that I need to wear them. They're prescription glasses for reading only. My left eye is so bad that if I close my right one, everything is blurry; when I got my eyes tested, I couldn't read more than one line with my left eye. It's like my right eye is supporting it somehow, which is why it constantly feels heavy and in pain.


I feel like my life is on the brink of change; I can feel it, I'm anticipating it. Everything is changing and it's not like it used to be. I hope it's for the better.


Also, I've made a list of all the places I want to live/visit in my life from 1 to 10.


1 Britain
2 Scotland
3 Ireland
4 Paris
5 Western Australia
6 Darwin
7 New Zealand
8 Iceland
9 Hawaai
10 Germany


As you can see, I'm a bit of a fan of the European countries and whatnot. :D I just love the history behind all these places. I want to travel the world and be a writer and an actor -- I guess you can say I want to live an adventurous life. Funnily enough, I want to have kids -- twin boys -- in my early twenties. I don't know how I'll do that, but I'll manage. :D



If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?
tarklovishki: (Default)

Not too long ago, a friend of mine said, in answer to my stressing over not getting into Pottermore, "Why don't you just wait until October like I'm doing? It's not that big of a deal."

We've always said we'd never work as a couple and that FUCKING PROVES IT! >:O I don't want to wait. I'm reading the pottermore tag page on Tumblr, and I'm getting pissed off at how many people GOT IN, and you want me to WAIT?! Do you not know how much of a fan I am, you stupid boy?!

-.- Exactly. I swear at my best friends when it comes to Harry Potter. He knows better than to refute me. Last time he tried, he barely escaped a jab to the jaw. If ever we got into a relationship - which is unlikely - I'd be BOSS and he'd be ... well. When I get into a rage, which is often, he knows better than to put his two cents in. He'd be whipped in the first minute.

Then he mocked me for my Tom Felton love. He laughed loudly when Tom's character got *SPOILER!* killed in the Rise of the Planet of the Apes. *END SPOILER*

See the reason why we'd never work out? He's also horrified that I've never seen The Matrix, Star Wars or Lord of the Rings. Dude! I'm getting there! Don't rush a girl ...
tarklovishki: (Default)

Your result for The Sorting Hat: A Comprehensive Harry Potter Personality Assessment [Test/Quiz]...

Slytherin

48% Ravenclaw, 38% Hufflepuff, 58% Slytherin and 55% Gryffindor!

Or perhaps in Slytherin

You'll make your real friends,

Those cunning folks use any means

To achieve their ends.

 

 

Slytherin's cardinal traits are ambition, cunning and determination. Like the Gryffindor House, Slytherins are emotionally volatile. In contrast, however, Slytherins are much less dominant and assertive, and less extraverted in general. Rather than expressing these emotions outwardly, Slytherins direct them inward or act in a passive aggressive manner. Both Gryffindor and Slytherin are much more driven to succeed than the other two houses: Gryffindor out of pride and Slytherin out of ambition.


 


Slytherins are also much more pragmatic than the other houses and more adept at manipulating people. A key trait would be a low level of agreeableness: Slytherins are more pessimistic, more distrustful than most, and more likely to attribute negative motivations to people. So although Slytherins experience a wide range of emotions, due to their distrustful views of people and skeptical worldview, they are less expressive and more likely to appear cold or distant unless provoked.


A Slytherin's ambitious nature comes out in different ways depending on what is important to the individual person. It could lead them to try to achieve top marks (if intellect and schooling is important to them) but it could also be directed at social settings or towards athletic endeavors.

Take The Sorting Hat: A Comprehensive Harry Potter Personality Assessment [Test/Quiz] at HelloQuizzy

I am amazed at how close I came to being a Gryffindor. I thought Ravenclaw would be closer. Just shows you how much of a mixed bag I am. I can't believe how much of a Hufflepuff I am. :O


tarklovishki: (Default)

That's it. I quit writing this week. I've done nothing but write and read, and I've got a massive fucking headache. After Netball today I'm going to sleep for a week. I'll probably disregard this post by tomorrow and start writing again as I usually do, but it feels so invigorating to say it--as though I've got a plan or some shit.

Waratah better watch out; I scared the hell out of them the last time that I played them; verbally abused the umpire for making the wrong calls (I'm six feet tall and I stand the correct distance of three feet when I put my arms up--its not my fault they are long!) and I scared the shooters and got banned for a week. I wasn't even trying to scare them, but whatever works.

On another note, I've got a nice warm bed to get to, I suggest to myself that I should just stop this post of absolute nothingness and climb into it before it's too late. We've got a 50-50 chance of getting into the semi's, and I'm pretty sure my team won't appreciate me fainting on the court. I've already forgotten to eat before the game twice already and nearly fainted. Pulling an all-nighter on the night before is stupid, yeah, but I can't help it.

If anyone is wondering, I'm a goal keeper. Can't shoot for shit.


Whoops!

Jul. 23rd, 2011 04:42 am
tarklovishki: (Default)
A six hour long video chat with my best friend over MSN has now just reminded me that I have not written a word for my hd_canon fest story in over a week. -.- No more proctrastination! I'm going to finish the damn thing. *Glares at Internet for being so distracting*

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